The Farm

 photo by Joseph Currall

Schilter Family Farm

 Just writing the title evokes warm memories of fun times. This is one of those great family farms, passed from one generation to the next, serving their community for the best times in life.  We began going to the Farm to pick pumpkins 16 years ago when we moved to Washington. It is so beautiful, snuggled in the Nisqually Valley, a picture perfect farm seen by thousands off the I5 Freeway in Southwest Washington.

We look forward every year to their Fall Festivities. It is just so darn country. So traditional. So homey, comfy, warm, squishy...you get my drift!!  It's so Mayberry RFD !  It represents all that is good. Fun. Family. Kids. Hay Rides. Pumpkins. Corn Maze. Christmas Trees. Hot chocolate. Coffee. Baby animals. Do you think I have some issues here? Maybe a wee bit sentimental?

And look at that grass....I love grass and isn't it beautiful?

Take a look at the floor in the gorgeous old barn above....look....spotless. The whole farm is like that.

This picture is Ed and "Farmer Fred" as the kids always called him. Ed enjoyed and looked forward to visiting with him every year. The boys once wrote Farmer Fred a letter asking about the farm. They got the most beautiful hand printed letter back from him. It hung on their bulletin board for YEARS. I wonder if he knew he meant something to the children who visited.

Fred Schilter along with his lovely wife Patti owned the farm for many, many years, more than 60 I believe. It was a dairy farm for most of that time. It now belongs to their son Jeff and his wife Stephanie. Both of their families work at the Farm in the Fall season, working their tails off for the good of the family and farm. It's so American. So old fashioned, so apple pie.....uh-oh it's my issues again. 

Every year on my birthday, Schilter's is where I choose to spend it. I have serious issues regarding Pumpkins and Jeff & Steph make sure we have a truck full!!

 See back there, those barn doors?  FUN stuff. Country crafts, yummy treats.....oh my gosh the puffed sweet corn stuff (don't know the name)...to die for!!!  I eat way too much of it every year.

The Corn Maze

Setting up Pumpkin Bowling

How 'bout some kitties?

How 'bout some flowers?  They plant all of these on the Farm. The hanging baskets are just gorgeous and sold at a great price!

The roadside stand has flowers, fresh produce which includes in-season berries and a line of canned goods!! We love to stop by the stand on Sundays and get goodies.

Ignore Ed and I and LOOK at this barn!!

The spectacular barn on the Farm is now a popular venue for wedding receptions. We attended one and it was just lovely. What a great place for country pictures. This barn is amazing in it's workmanship, built in 1865, the beams and siding are just gorgeous. It's used for the super fun Hay Maze in the Fall, is decorated for parties and receptions during the good weather season and beautifully decorated with a Creche in the winter for Christmas during tree cutting season.

We love this farm and the family who runs it. If you are ever near Olympia Washington stop by.

http://www.schilterfamilyfarm.com/

 https://www.facebook.com/SchilterFamilyFarm?fref=ts

~Lent Blessings~

Lisa

Self Examination

I am a Catholic. As such, we are taught to do an "Examination of Conscience" daily if possible. This is a good thing, especially since it's Lent.  It is always good to examine our deeds, thoughts, intentions in our days.  This is to be done hopefully with a balanced mind so as not to become scrupulous or at the other end of the spectrum, full of excuses.

I am trying to do this more right now because we are "living" with a LOT of other people here at Ronald McDonald House. This is both a blessing and a difficult task.  Where do you go when you know you need down time but need to make meals or be with the kids? How do you have time for quiet reflection when it isn't your own home and you cannot, say, make a meal in quiet thought?  There are just inherent difficulties when being with so many other people.  I have written about the abundant good things about this experience but the last few days have also been challenging.

I must, especially now, examine my conscience more so that my intentions, my conversation, my deeds are an effort in the right direction and not what is easiest. Easy sounds lovely....it is NOT lovely though. Easy is a trap.  I am so tired medically but I can't let that, something that will always be around, cloud my actions. My feelings and my actions must be separate.  I am struggling with this. I have to try harder, pray more, smile brighter.

Lent. It is Lent folks. Jesus was tempted....we will be tempted.  He didn't fail....we will. Being a Saint, a Christian, a decent human being requires not that we be perfect, but that we screw up, get up and continue on in a life of service to Christ and others.....with a smile.

Good Lenten Wishes~
      Lisa

Tiffany & Co.

With a medical trip like the one we are on, with so many hard things in a short span of time, I thought I nice trip to Tiffany & Co. was in order. It's a lovely store with many, many lovely things. 

   The gentleman that waited on me was kind, helpful and funny.  I knew what I was looking for, a tiny sterling heart with the Tiffany logo.  He showed me several things, all beautiful. 

After I made my small purchase, he put it in a soft velvety bag....

  Then he gently lay it in a beautiful box and proceeded to tie the most perfect bow....

I teased him about a man making a perfect bow and he said it was quite the challenge on his first day but now he was a pro.

Then into a beautiful Tiffany Blue bag he put my treasure....

It's wonderful to do something totally frivolous sometimes.

~Blessings~

Lisa

Lists

I LOVE lists...... I love making lists, reading lists, crossing things off my lists.  Lists are lovely!!!

I love long skinny lists with designs on the top.

I love pink legal pads.

I love small note pads with lines

I love the back of envelopes.

I love sticky notes in all colours.

I love my planner.

If you are not an organized person or a list person or just not totally neurotic this little post may not be interesting. Lists help me because due to circumstances beyond my control, my brain doesn't work at full capacity and if I don't write everything down it's GONE rather quickly. I even have lists of my lists when things are really hairy like this trip.

I even have an online list that I absolutely love not just because it's a list but because it is so simple and by golly I need simple.  It allows you to make lists for each day (which is not so amazing) but the amazing part is that whatever is not crossed off said list, magically appears on the next day!! I love this. It keeps me in line and not overwhelmed by the next day thinking I have not finished today's list.

As crazy as I am regarding my lists, (just ask my husband when he tries to write on one of my lists.....growl) I really appreciate this online list because it is super simple without complicated tasks that many online calendars or organizers have. 

Simple, simple, simple.

It is www.teuxdeux.com   

Make your lists online and see what you think. I am a simple minded girl so this is perfect for me. I am not a techy so if you are, this may be kindergarten 101 for you.....I am in kindergarten 101 so it makes me happy!

~Blessings~

      Lisa

Sometimes Less is More

You know, we live in a word saturated society. With technology booming, the word is flying fast and furious......many times with no restraint. 

I have used a lot of words in the last month on this medical trip. I have also held back many. I've learned from many years of experience and many mistakes how to try and hold my tongue in the proper circumstances. Do I always succeed at this endeavor ?  Ummmm  NO.  But I do try, and I get better and better at it as I age. 

We don't always have to say everything that comes into our brains. This is the problem of a whole generation born into technology but it is also a problem of those of us who are outgoing, extroverted, helpful or just plain talkative.  It's an impulse, a drive, a compulsion for some of us; one that must be controlled if we are not to hurt or even overwhelm others. 

I have in the past looked up in Scripture, the different passages that have to do with too many words. Oh boy is that enlightening...and frightening.  I have a big mouth and have had since I can remember. My kindergarten report card said I had diarrhea of the mouth....really?? Yes, really.  I have battled it all my life. It's why people like me....and why they don't. I am blessed with the gift of gab but have had to learn over many years how that gift affects others for the good or the bad. 

Do I encourage, lift up, support others? 

Do I tell the truth?

Do I share, in the hopes of helping someone?

Do I have someone's good in mind when I speak?

Do I say too much?

Do I speak beyond what I know about?

Do I take over with my speech?

Do I let pride speak ahead of my knowledge?

Do I let others speak? 

Do I know when NOT to speak?    (Probably the most important question)

There are times when NOT saying things is a huge blessing. There are stories that don't need to be told, opinions better kept to oneself, judgments better left unmade.  How often do I ask myself, "Should I have kept that to myself"?   Probably not enough, but I am trying.  I see that most of the time when it happens that I have failed, Pride is at the root. I think I know everything so I must share my infinite wisdom.....blah!  It's pitiful really....I hate it.  I am always sorry when I see this in myself and it reminds me of something a wonderful priest told me once. "Words are like the feathers of a pillow. If you go to the top of a steeple, cut open a feather pillow what happens"?  Yes, getting our words back after speaking them is much like trying to get all those feathers back from the wind.....impossible.

I guess I am writing about this because I have felt good about most of my speech on this trip. I have tried super hard.  I have used the gift of gab hopefully for the good of others. I have also had to hold my tongue....many times. For once I can say I have succeeded about 90% of the time. However, the trip isn't over yet, neither is the stress, neither is Original Sin and it's effects.  Pray for me, pray that I can keep going and not get in trouble!!  It is Lent after all and I know falling on my face is a huge possibility.

~Lent Blessings~

      Lisa

Charity

   One of the things that is so special about being here at Ronald McDonald House of Long Island is the constant charity we get to witness. Every day a different group comes and cooks or serves dinner. On holidays, folks come and decorate or do crafts with the residents. There are wonderful treats given to residents as they become available from a wide source of generous donations to the House. For example, Steven and Ed were invited to throw out the first pitch at a Mets game at Citi Field!!  That was no small treat let me tell you!!   It was right after our daughter's brain surgery and such a welcome distraction for the guys. 

The next trip, Ed and the three youngest boys were given tickets for the 1st row....behind home plate....of the Yankees!!!  Those beauties were donated to Ronald McDonald House by Make~A~Wish of New York.  What a day they had. It was also Old Timers Day so it was especially wonderful for Ed.  Notice the shirts below ~

                                                                 Pretty cool huh??

    While we were here for St. Valentine's Day this trip, several groups came to the House to help us celebrate. One group brought all the makings for cut-out sugar cookies. There were a couple adults and several teens. They made stations for the kids (and grown-ups too) to cut out the cookies, and another to cut out fondant for the tops.  There was a third station to create a decorative box to put the cookies and Valentines in and a fourth to craft beautiful St. Valentine cards..  Here is my amateur photo shoot !

 

    

 

 

   See all the snow in the background? The volunteers ventured out after that crazy blizzard we had!!

   It was a lovely morning of making cookies, boxes and cards.  There was also a group there making cupcakes to decorate. The goodness of people abounds here. That others want to serve us simply because we are far from home with a sick child/children and would enjoy doing something "normal" is such a blessing. 

  Volunteering your time has profound meaning. If you don't already, think about volunteering to do something. If you are sad, down, feeling unappreciated, this is a great way to solve those problems. Service is never a waste of time and it will help you to be thankful for what you have.

   Thank you Ronald McDonald House of Long Island for sharing your gifts with us. Thank you to all the donors of things like baseball tickets! Thank you to all the volunteers who made our holiday brighter and fun!! 

~Blessings~

     Lisa

Vocation

vo·ca·tion  

/vōˈkāSHən/

Noun A strong feeling of suitability for a particular career or occupation. A person's employment or main occupation, esp. regarded as particularly worthy and requiring great dedication.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We are still here in NYC on our lovely medical trip. I use the word lovely loosely!  There are many blessings about this particular trip, many. There are also many difficult things as you might imagine with 3 brain surgeries in 3 weeks.   Vocation. Being the Catholic Girl that I am, that word evokes many wonderful, serious, happy, deep, varied thoughts and emotions. It is a much used phrase in Catholic writing and teaching. The above copy and paste is from the dictionary. Then there is the religious definition of the word : Vocation ~ (From Latin vocare: to call) The calling from God to follow a particular way of life.    This is what I am speaking of. My vocation of wife and mother. This vocation is so ingrained in me that not only is it what I am but who I am.  It is everything I have always wanted and thankfully received from God in a grand way....you know....those 8 kids!!!  If your going to do something, do it big!  My vocation comes first. After my love of God this is what is most important to me.     We are on week four of this trip. Staying at Ronald McDonald House is a huge blessing in many ways but most important for me is that it allows me to continue my vocation as well as possible in a stressful, dis-combobulated time. Tonight it was my turn to be here at the house and for Ed to stay with Bobby at the hospital.  I could tell last evening as I switched with him that the kids needed me with them because they needed the structure and discipline (in the positive sense of the word) that Mom provides. Ed is totally a Mr. Mom and always has been, but he is also Mr. Popular with the kids so routine and structure are not his strong points....they are not his vocation.  I got our day started with an appointment for Steven then some grocery shopping. I made lunch, cleaned out the fridge, organized our room, attended to some medical emails then had Steven, only a week out of ICU, lay down for a nap. I lay down with him..... a nice part of the vocation. I am only 3 weeks out of my own brain surgery so a nap was just lovely.    We got up later, went downstairs and got to visit with folks, laugh, have some treats then think about dinner.  My wonderful friend and awesome cook, Laurie decided we'd make pork chops for dinner together. She took on part of the meal, me the other.  To have a big, hot, yummy dinner with homemade mashed potatoes, fried pork chops and her mouth watering gravy warmed me to my soul. To plan, cook, clean up, put my mental and emotional self at ease. It was work. Why would this relax me so?  Because it is my vocation, my call from God to serve my family. It was so good for all of us and it made me once again appreciate my roll in this life for now. The only thing missing was the rest of our family, not only Daddy and Bobby but our older kids back home.     I believe vocation is a lost art, a lost spiritual gift.  To be a good mother or wife, I must know why I would want this. I believe a woman only knows her job when she can see it in the context of vocation or calling. It's too difficult, too thankless at times, too nerve racking, and all those things naysayers want to say about motherhood.  When I see my life as a wife and mother in light of a call from God to do something great, I can persevere. If it is just a human want then it can fade, languish, be replaced by something more fun, more me-oriented. Knowing it comes from God gives me a peace of mind that I can fall back on when I am feeling DONE. You know how that is, that statement I make so often...."I am DONE" with a wave of my crazy hand! I often say this to my husband after a harried day. What "done" actually means I have no clue, but it helps me just to say it!   I guess I just needed to define my job tonight. Things are so crazy and out of whack while we are here, this day's duties made me feel thankful and warmly appreciative of my job, my vocation, as a servant. YES, a servant....to God and my family. Service is a highly under rated quality in our modern times.  I served today, and I am high as a kite. The kids are fed, have clean clothes, have had lots of my attention and conversation and are sleeping all cozy in their beds as I write. Bobby is cozy in his hospital bed with Daddy by his side. I took the time tonight too, to call my parents and connect, call and tell Ed "I love you" and watch "Hello, Dolly" with my boys.  Even in hard times with three brain surgeries in three weeks, life is good.  ~Blessings~     Lisa

Truth, Beauty and Goodness

   Sorry there has been no posting for weeks. We are 3 brain/spine surgeries into this trip and exhausted. Mine went well, Steven's went well and now Bobby recovers in the hospital. It' 4 AM as I write. I haven't had a whole night's sleep in a month. It's all fine though and we are schlepping through it.  Thankfully our wonderful Ronald McDonald House of Long Island and it's residents and staff keep us grounded and in wonderful company.  We have had much fun and laughter as well on this crazy medical trip.

    I am so tired but was thinking last night about what is real in this life. My memory after all these circus antics in the O.R. is getting worse all the time, so I can't remember who taught it to me or where, but the title of this post was pounded in during my faith formation.

   Truth, Beauty and Goodness. I was thinking how, regardless of the circumstances of the world we must live in, those three things make life worthy to try and get into heaven to see them in full size and color.

    We stood by Bobby's bedside watching him helplessly stare at us wanting to speak, but not being able because of the breathing tube.  He was on a ventilator. It was so darn hard, but even during that, I could sort of mentally step back and see that everything was happening as it was supposed to. His lovely nurse did everything that could possibly be done for him and us during a stressful, active time. She was on top of every little thing, speaking to him so softly and with kindness. I just watched her and felt deep gratitude. It was pure goodness that she rubbed his hands, looked right into his eyes and moved as fast as possible to give him a med push to sedate him. It was merciful. Every time he would "come to the surface" so to speak she was right by him. It was more than a job, more than a paycheck. It was Truth, Beauty and Goodness. This was the nitty gritty of all of those acts.

    Living at Ronald McDonald House this past month is the same. There is the gamut of wonderful to awful and in it all, is Truth, Beauty and Goodness.  We all share things, offer rides, store trips, an ear. Last week I sat with a Mom who had been hit with a mental and emotional 2 X 4 when her son had a simple accident playing and was found to have a brain tumor when they scanned him. Another whose 4 children have what we all do and has been living our same life.  Another with a son who struggles with the acceptance of his diagnosis, while the Mother has many of her own medical problems. We talked, laughed and cried into the wee hours of the morning and connected in ways you just can't on the "outside" of this circus. In this circus where we sit, perform, live, we are where the rubber hits the road...walking the walk....you know. Things are very REAL for us, even raw.  Last night, this scripture popped out at me.....

Philippians 4:11-13

 11 Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. 12 I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. 13 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

   I read once that one mark of a saint is when they come to understand that when you are "up" you will always come "down" and when you are "down" you will always come "up". This is the only way to live constantly in this life of medical mumbo-jumbo. Knowing when things are so very hard, that one day soon we will be doing something totally normal and fun with the family. But to also know, with certainty, that in our life when we are having a breather, the hard times will be back. This doesn't frighten or stress us anymore. It's like breathing. Up and down....up and down.  It's all okay. It's all a part of God's plan.  It's what was planned from all eternity for us for a greater good. We have to know this deeply or we would truly lose our minds.

   Today I was thinking of Ed and how this is so different for each of us. We have the common experience as parents doing all of this, but he has the additional weight of me going through it too. At one point during the whole ventilator time, as I took my turn satnding at Bobby's bedside, he sat down for a moment behind me and I felt like I could read his thoughts. Here he was, helplessly watching his youngest son plead with us with his eyes to rescue him and Ed could do NOTHING to help him. Men are hardwired to solve problems, fix things, rescue. He was watching this scene and here was Bobby in the bed, tubes, drains and wires everywhere, me at his side, bald and with multiple incisions on my own head, one fresh from 2 weeks ago. It had to have been a helpless scene to him.  I don't have the weight he carries of having to care for all of us.  We haven't even had time to digest or talk about it all yet. I see though, his always being there for us all, for making all the logistics happen smoothly, for never doing anything for himself....in this is Truth, Beauty and Goodness. He is a rock, a rock that is so stinkin' tired...and in this too, there is Truth, Beauty and Goodness. 

   The staff here at the hospital has been amazing as usual. They care not only for the kids but Ed and I as well. When I had a Mommy Meltdown after Steven's surgery, wondering why I must torture my children over and over, the nurse was there to comfort me and bring me back to the "whys" of why we were there at all. She could see the whole picture when, at that moment, I could not. Her comforting voice, her wisdom and taking the time to talk with me were a huge dose of Truth, Beauty and Goodness on a hard day.

   Our surgeon, giving me a tight hug and telling me the 23rd surgery will go as well as the 22nd.....as I was in tears saying good bye yet again to a child at "the kissing corner"; the place where you say your goodbyes before the doors to the O.R. open.  His care and understanding were Truth, Beauty and Goodness.

   I could go on and on. In the years of this crazy circus, I have come to see the spiritual realm in daily life very clearly because it's so REAL to us. If it isn't our family, it's another of the many medical families we have come to know. It's knowing for ourselves and others, this life passes. That it is real but sort of not real either.....real life begins later with no pain, no sin, only life in the eternal light of Christ and all those who have made it there. I cannot wait. It becomes more real all the time.  I have to stay and try to teach our children about suffering, joy, pain and laughter. About them not being the center of their universe, about seeing pain in others and doing something about it. About selflessness, kindness, self restraint and prayer.  About  Truth, Beauty and Goodness

~Blessings~  Lisa